Rick and Morty's Big Frozen Adventure
by Black-Librarian Skirath
Summary: They thought she was cursed, but the truth is far stranger than anyone could have imagined. A scientist, master of dimensional travel, and his grandson travel to Elsa's realm, changing her life forever.


_Welp, this was really unprecedented. Since I really wasn't expecting to write anything for FF for a while, and since this was kind of spawned from a sudden flare of inspiration and love I'll go ahead and give a bit of background for this story. I was talking to my girlfriend, known around the internet on deviantart and her tumblr as Allhailweegee, as well as for her other tumblr King Candy By Day, and she read somewhere on a wild speculation blog that Elsa received her powers from Rick, half of weird Adult Swim show I love known as Rick and Morty. Obviously neither of us took it seriously, and we had a good laugh about it. Later on she told me on skype that the thought of it was still making her laugh, so I decided to write something to her, still on skype mind you, to illicit one of those adorable cry-laughs I like to make her do. So through a half-hour of writing I made this. Her reaction was hilariously not positive. I should also probably bring up the fact that I haven't bothered to see Frozen yet, my GF saw it in theaters though. Hell, I don't even know what the other girl's name is, Anya or Annabelle or some crap like that. Anyways, against my better judgement I've decided to give this to the world. Let what may, come.  
_

**Rick:** *Pops out of dimensional vortex* "Alright Morty, here we are."

**Morty:** "Aww geez, where are we now Rick?"

**Rick:** "Dimension Dis-20-13-Ny, a magical realm Morty, full of... *Burps* Cyclops, a-a-a-a-and trolls and crap"

**Morty: **"Ah... I-I-I don't think we should hang around here too long Rick, I don't wanna get... you know, involved, with any of that magic stuff, i-i-it doesn't bode well, I mean-"

**Rick:** "Morty, shut... just... Just shut the hell up, look over there" *Points to two little girls playing happily behind a high iron fence* "See those girls Morty?"

**Morty:** "Y-Yeah... but I don't see wha-" *Gets picked up by Rick and thrown over the fence, landing directly on his face* "Oooh... ooogawd... ooo... hrrnn..."

*Rick easily hops the fence, landing on Morty's back*

**Elsa:** "Umm... hello, you both seem very-"

**Rick:** "Just settle down there little girl, I know we seem *burps and drools* V-very... *Burps again* Very strange, but I can assure you that that's not the case. Now then..." *Pulls out a brightly glowing object that looks like a blue snowball*

**Elsa:** "What's tha-" *Rick throws the snowball point blank in Elsa's face, knocking her to the ground, instantly rendering her unconscious*

**Guards:** "You there, what have you done to the princess!?"

**Rick:** *Grabs Morty's legs and starts dragging him to another portal* "Come on Morty! We-e-e-e we gotta go!"

***MANY YEARS LATER***

*Rick and Morty appear once again in the frozen wasteland that was dimension Dis-20-13-Ny, their previous experiences in this dimension having occurred mere seconds ago for them*

**Rick:** "Alright, looks like the Genetic Fridgifier worked." *Pulls out snow shovel* Here Morty, start shoveling, we need as much of this snow as possible."

**Morty:** *Still severely injured from falling on his face* "Ugh... W-Wha... What happened here Rick? What did you do to that little girl?"

**Rick:** "I altered her DNA Morty. I made it so that later in her life *burps the word "she"* would develop uncontrollable ice powers, and would cover this whole region in snow"

**Morty:** "W-What?! Rick, W-W-W-Why would you do that?! You probably ruined that girl's whole life!"

**Rick:** "I did it for science Morty, and sometimes you gotta crack some little girls if you want science to move forward. I mean, geez, do I gotta explain everything to you Morty? You're not charismatic enough to get away with being clueless all the time. Now start shoveling."

**Morty:** *Grabs the shovel, but glares at Rick* "I... wait, why did you want to make everything all cold?"

**Rick:** "For the snow Morty, when places get cold it snows. And what do people use snow for?"

**Morty:** "I... I... I think you're leading me to something, but... I don't know what it is Rick, I'm not sure why we're here...

**Rick:** "Shut Up Morty, It was rhetorical anyway. The answer is Snow Cones Morty, and I'm gunna corner the market on them... use the money to fund my science stuff."

**Morty:** "What?! You mutated that little girl and destroyed this magical place for Snow Cones!?"

**Rick:** "Its freaking July, Morty! How *burps* how else was I supposed to get snow? Now am I gonna have to shovel this all up myself or are you going to help?"

**Morty:** "This... T-T-This is wrong Rick. You... Y-You... You son of a bitch. That's what you are Rick, a real son of a bitch!"

**Rick:** "Where do you get off judging me? This'll benefit you too, Morty. Think about it, all the flavored slush your little boy mouth can tolerate. Lotta girls'll be *burps* real interested in the grandson of the world's new Snow Cone tycoon... Now just-"

*Olaf appears from the forest, smiling and waving"

**Olaf:** "Oh, hello there! I haven't seen either of you ar-"

*Rick and Morty start screaming*

**Morty**: "WHA-WHAT IS THAT RICK, I-I-I'VE NEVER SEEN SOMETHING LIKE THAT! WHAT IS IT?!

**Rick: **"I DON'T KNOW MORTY, I DON'T KNOW! ITS LIKE SOME KINDA MAN MADE OUT OF SNOW! OH GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE, I'VE INADVERTANTLY CREATED A RACE OF RAPACIOUS SNOW RAIDERS!

**Olaf:** "Oh, umm... why are you two screamin-"

*Rick pulls out a laser gun*

**Rick:** BACK OFF FROST-MAN, OR I'LL TURN YOU INTO WATER! I SW-*Burp*-EAR I'LL DO IT!"

**Olaf:** Ooh! What's that?" *Reaches his stick arms towards Rick and Morty*

**Rick:** "AH! IT'S ATTACKING MORTY! AAAAAAAAAAARGH! *Starts firing wildly, missing every time. Rick manages to hit a tree behind Olaf, setting it on fire*

**Olaf:** AH! *Starts screaming and waddling in a serpentine motion towards the forest, his stick arms flailing wildly above his head*

**Rick:** *Grabs Morty by the shirt collar* Come on Morty! We gotta go, before it gets reinforcements!" *Both enter the portal*

*Rick and Morty appear outside in their own dimension, both panting heavily*

**Morty:** "Oh... Oh Rick... I, I... w-w-what are we gonna do?"

**Rick:** "I-It's...Oh God, it's okay... Morty, it's okay. We just won't go back to that dimension. Let's... Ugh, let's just call that one a mulligan, okay?"

**Morty:** "But Rick, what... what do you suppose that snow-monster wanted?"

**Rick:** "Nothing good, Morty, that much I know. Me... I'm too old to serve any purpose, it'd probably of just taken me back to its people as food... As for you, well... I think it was gunna rape you, Morty."

**Morty:** *Eyes widen and mouth opens in shock, locked in stunned silence for 5 seconds* "W-What!? How do you know it wanted to do that?!"

**Rick:** "Ever see the movie Jack Frost, Morty? And I don't mean that kiddy, feel good one... Besides, I could see it, see it right in its big, evil, cartoony eyes"

**Morty:** "Ugh... Umm... I... I just... W-W-What about all the people in that dimension, what about that little girl?"

**Rick:** *pulls out a flask and takes a long drink from it, once its empty he tosses it behind his back* "I wouldn't worry about it. I'm *burps the word "sure"* they'll sort it out... Let's go see what's on TV."

**FIN**


End file.
